| This is a parody of Smash Mouth's
"All Star," which appeared in the film "Mystery Men."
The films being summarized are Sam Raimi's "Evil Dead 2" and "Army of Darkness," two cult film classics.
Did I ever tell you I got Bruce Campbell to call me a "pontificator"?
Click here for the lyrics to the original song.
Professor Knowby got turned into adobe,
Translatin' from the Book of the Dead
We were thinking we were toast
As we listened to his ghost
Telling us how to banish the undead
Well the Evil Dead come and they won't stop coming
Shotgun is full and the chain-saw is running
They turned my girlfriend to demon food
And stole her soul, which I thought was rude
She bit my hand--it grew some claws
So I cut it off with a chainsaw
The Book of the Dead has a spell
To send the undead back to Hell
Hey now, got a shotgun & a chainsaw, Let's go!
Do you want a little, no I didn't think so!
But can we hold out that long?
Hear the demons shout "Dead by dawn!"
To defeat them,
Annie reads from the pages;
The demons flee, but I'm in the Dark Ages
There's a pit of death -- I get tossed in it
But I kill the ghouls with my chainsaw and split it
With my boom-stick the locals were impressed
As was Sheila who came to me scantily-dressed
The wise men tell me to get back home
Get the Necronomicon and say a damned poem
I found the right book
but the magic words mistook
And so an Army of the Dead did appear
I said 'hey! You send me back!
I don't care if the undead attack
I got your book, get me out of here!"
But my evil twin and
his undead kept coming
Henry the Red and his soldiers came running
My evil twin turned my girl undead
Revenge for when I blew off his head
Gunpowder blazed and people died
Thank God Henry's men were on our side
Together we beat the attack
And so the wise men sent me back
CHORUS to end